This is the mother load for me. Everything is my responsibility and my fault, good or bad, happy or sad. Drinking was my personal stick to beat myself with for years. I could ‘why me?’ about drinking ad infinitum. Why am I the only one who can’t drink normally? What did I do to make this happen to me? On and on and on.
Personalisation is where we attribute personal responsibility for something, including the resulting blame or praise, for events over which we have no control (source) Or, welcome to the world of parenting, I digress 😉
Nothing allows this better than drinking. Imbibe lip loosening, inhibition dropping addictive substance in vast quantities and stand well back. OK so I picked up the first glass that IS my responsibility. But the cascade of events afterwards, however much the bottle of alcohol says ‘drink responsibly’ – sorry this is an oxymoron and paradox rolled into one.
Strategy, for the last time, involves – you guessed it – checking the evidence! Not everything is our fault and it doesn’t always happen to me only. I am just not that damn special or ‘terminally unique’ as AA would say 🙂
I should say everything was my responsibility because I’m drawing boundaries around this one and progress is swift when you put down the glass. Maybe you’d like to join me? 🙂