Daily Archives: 26/02/2015

Veronica Valli and I (9) discuss Step 4

So this was a marathon conversation between Veronica and I with 3 Skype discussions as there was so much to talk about.  Here we discuss Step 4 which reads: Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.  I post this with a warning as some of the information (particularly part 2) discussed maybe a trigger for you.  Proceed with caution.

Part 1 of our discussion on what Step 4 means and how by examining our resentments we can become free of alcoholism.

Part 2 is a discussion on resentments and the inventory process helps us become free of them

And then finally part 3 where we have a discussion on what it means to do a fear inventory and sex conduct inventory.

A lot of what this process does is very similar to what I am learning at Cambridge.  Yes truly!  What she describes in part 3 about putting things down on paper and moving from the unconscious to the conscious is us ‘labelling’ them.  Taking the emotional heat out of them by engaging our higher cognitive function as we discussed in the flipping our lid post here.

I appreciate that Veronica covered a great deal of ground and so I’ve written some notes for the key parts of what she said that you can access here: Step 4 with Veronica Valli notes

Just having this discussion with Veronica was hugely cathartic for me and I am now really beginning to understand the power of the 12 steps if done well with a sponsor (and a secret wish that Veronica was my sponsor!)

We’ll be back in a few weeks discussing Step 5.  We do hope that you are enjoying these and finding them useful and please let me know your thoughts in the comments.

Veronica Valli is an Addictions Therapist and the author of Why you drink and How to stop:http://www.amazon.com/Why-You-Drink-H…

2013 How to Stop Cover 960x1280