Before and After Selfie at 2 years

I wrote a post before entitled Before and After Selfie and opened it with this sentence: ‘I wish I had had the foresight to do this when I stopped.’

Sorting through things to move recently I came across three photos which means I inadvertently did have the foresight it would seem 🙂  Amazing what you unearth when you aren’t looking for it!

So here they are – 4 photos of me:

  1. Taken on 9th June 2013 at 4.32 in the afternoon – a Sunday, 15 weeks to the day before I quit.  Probably had a cracking hangover and was waiting for wine o’clock so I could do it all again.  I don’t look happy, pretty dead behind the eyes, my face is puffy and I have a give-away red drinkers nose!!
  2. Taken on 30th October 2013.  Around 5 weeks after I stopped.  Eyes are already brighter, puffiness is pretty much gone and nose is less Rudolph like 😉
  3. Taken on 6th August 2014.  6 weeks away from 1 year sober.  All facial puffiness is gone, nose looking normal.  Have also lost 12lbs by then.
  4. And Sunday, 20th September 2015.  2 years sober tomorrow and looking more comfortable in my skin 🙂

I certainly look happier don’t I?  Like the longer without booze the bigger my smile/grin gets 🙂  And you can see how my hair has grown in that time too – maybe it’s a Samson thing going on? I got stronger as my hair grew longer! LOL 😀

It’s taken me 2 years to feel comfortable with the idea of sharing my photo on my blog.  I hate having my photo taken and would  have been useless today in the era of selfies!  I think I was afraid of family or friends finding the blog and then through photos linking it with me.  I was still ashamed of my drinking even though I hadn’t done anything under it’s influence for 2 years.  I still felt ashamed for being in recovery.

But not anymore.  It is part of me now – and so I embrace it like I do the fact that I have blonde hair and blue eyes.  I don’t hide it away in some dark corner like so many of my emotions that I tried to suppress in the past.  That’s what took me to this place in the first place and kept me trapped for so long!  No more secrecy.  No more shame.  No more hiding.  As Brene says shame feeds on secrecy, silence and judgement (of self or of others).  No more.  And I’m doing the next right thing for me, which links perfectly with this parting gift today.

This short video comes courtesy of Glennon Doyle Melton over at Momastery and it’s about rock bottom.  That picture of me taken before I stopped drinking maybe doesn’t look like a rock bottom but it sure felt like it to me and I feel much happier like this 🙂

Me all smiley happy people :)










39 thoughts on “Before and After Selfie at 2 years

    1. Hey me fixing me! Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog 🙂 I am more happy now than I ever was in my happiest moments drinking. I now finally get the AA saying that my worst day sober is not better than my best day drunk 😉

  1. Congratulation on 2 years Lucy x And you look fab, I hope you don’t mind me saying but also a good 10 years younger!

    1. Hey Minnymoo! Thank you and 10 years younger sounds good to me! 🙂

  2. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. 🙂 I am happy for you and thank you for putting the pictures up; they show both the prison and the freedom. The first photo got my stomach in a knot. Very confrontational, in a good way that is; I realise now that indeed nobody wants to become an addict when they are grown up. :-/ I am happy that you freed yourself. 🙂
    xx, Feeling

    1. I know feeling – someone said that in the first photo I looked sad and lost and actually that’s a really good description (so thank you Deborah!). I’m happy to 🙂 xx

  3. Wow- stunning. We are so blind to ourselves in the beginning. I am still shocked and saddened to realize that the tiny broken veins on my cheeks and nose have almost gone away. They weren’t there because I turned 50. My alcoholism was showing. Quitting drinking is like aging backwards and your pictures show it. This was so cool. Lori

    1. Thanks Lori. My friend Veronica Valli said quitting drinking was like getting a facelift and before I thought ‘really’? Now I completely agree! 🙂

  4. Good Morning,

    You look ten years younger. We do not realize how puffy and tired we look when we are in the disease of alcoholism.

    1. Good afternoon Jackie! Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog 🙂 Plus thank you for the compliment and I completely agree – we get so used to this being normal for us that we don’t imagine we could look or feel any different ….

  5. This is why we should never forget why we started this journey!! You look marrrrvelous! I’m so proud of us. 🙂

  6. Ditto that.

    In the first photo, you look like you have a cold or the flu or something. A very rough 43 years old. It’s also the only pic in which you’re not smiling, even a little bit.

    You definitely look way more awesome in the final photo, and props to whoever figured out the “soft, natural light” angle. When you finally write a book, you can use that as your jacket photo.

    1. SC You made me laugh several times there 😀 I do look sh*t in the first photo and not even beer googles would have rectified that! I didn’t smile as my hangovers were grim and getting worse – hence why my blogs called A Hangover Free Life. It really is my biggest reward and motivator. MrHOF was the photographer and got his step-ladder out and everything 😉 As for writing books maybe one day ….

      1. Yeah, I don’t want to be all “male gaze” here, so I apologize in advance if this comes out the wrong way.

        But in the first pic, it’s like, “Ewww…. Sad grandma with 20 cats.”

        And in the second pic, it’s like , “Whoa, HOTTIE.”

      2. LOL You make me laugh SC! Yep to the first one and why thank you kind sir 🙂

  7. Astonishing and beautiful – the years have fallen from you, the worry and shame, the agony of hangovers from which you are now free – what a wonderful post and you are just glowing in all ways. So grateful to have contact with you and to be sharing this journey with you and all others who have crossed the bridge, thank you Lucy and huge congratulations for your incredible achievements in the last two years xxx Binki

    1. Oh Wendy you make me blush *blushes* Thank you pretty lady yourself 🙂 xx

    1. Hey 19Cathleen! Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog and for your kind words 🙂

  8. Hi Louise. I follow your blog and look forward to the blogs but never comment because I am too shy! But the photographs are amazing. You look so happy and relaxed in your own skin. What an inspiration ! Keep blogging. I absolutely love your posts!

    1. Hey LikaBW Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog 🙂 I’m so pleased you’ve said hello and thank you thank you thank you!

  9. Your progress photos are AMAZING and a big wake up call for me. It’s early morning of Day 5 AF and I am not sure what I look like — today, yesterday, last week, months. The reason is that I’ve become an expert at avoiding mirrors over the past few years. I got tempted by the Facebook phenomena a couple of years ago. Old friends from years ago were trying to get a group together. I opened an account, smiled at seeing their older, yet lovely, selfie pics. Of course they wanted to see my pic, too. So I did my hair and makeup, grabbed my phone, and snapped away. I was horrified at how I looked – bloated, bloodshot eyes and face, exhausted, and sad. A recent quote I heard immediately came to mind: “If you drink like a man, expect to start looking like one.” I never visited FB again and sadly missed the op to reconnect with old friends. But at least I still had my best friend, Merlot, and we spent that night (and all since) blotting out the loneliness. Counting AF days is helpful, but improving future selfies are now my bigger motivator. Thanks for sharing yours. I’ll be a regular visitor here. xxx – Clair

    1. Hey Clair! Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog 🙂 Day 5 AF is awesome – go you!! I know what you mean about that expression and it would sum up accurately my drinking photo too 🙁 Please do visit often and let me know how you’re getting on xx

  10. Huge congrats on two years. I am fortunate to have met you in the flesh, as it were, but it’s great to see the photos – you really look transformed. Well done for posting them, powerful stuff. x

    1. Thanks Libby for your ongoing support and regular coffee catch ups 🙂 xx

  11. You look cool, calm and collected! You have provided me with determination.

    1. Hey Gabi Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog 🙂 And thank you for the compliment. You go girl!!

  12. Your pictures are amazing.
    I have spent the last two days watching your videos with Veronica and want to thank you both so much for showing me how I need to get support to help me succeed this time.

    1. Hey Kitty Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog 🙂 Happy to hear that Veronica & I’s discussions have been helpful to you too!

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