Daily Archives: 10/03/2017

Sober Inspiration: Tiny Beautiful Things

Oh man.  I watched an interview with Cheryl Strayed recently and it compelled me to seek out her writing.  I’d already seen the film Wild and it had reduced me to tears so I knew what this women had to say would resonate – if you haven’t seen the film I’ve left the trailer below as encouragement 😉 Same age, difficult experiences, truth teller – my kind of woman!   And so I ordered Tiny Beautiful Things from the library and have not been disappointed.  As Amazon writes: ‘This bestselling book from the author of Wild collects the best of The Rumpus’s Dear Sugar advice columns plus never-before-published pieces. Rich with humor, insight, compassion—and absolute honesty—this book is a balm for everything life throws our way.’

Here’s just a few of her gems:

There’s a saying about drug addicts that they stop maturing emotionally at the age they start using, and I’ve known enough addicts to believe this to be true enough.”

The healing power of even the most microscopic exchange with someone who knows in a flash precisely what you’re talking about because she experienced that thing too cannot be overestimated….. Find online communities where you can have conversations with people during which you don’t have to pretend a thing….. This is how you get unstuck.  You reach….. She had to want it more than she’d wanted anything.  She had to grab like a drowning girl for every good thing that came her way and swim like fuck away from every bad thing.  She had to count the years and let them roll by, to grow up and then run as fast as she could in the direction of her best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by her own desire to heal.

Acceptance has everything to do with simplicity, with sitting in the ordinary place, with bearing witness to the plain facts of our life, with not just starting at the essential, but ending up there.  Acceptance asks only that you embrace what’s true.  Allow your acceptance to be a transformative experience.  You do that by simply looking it square in the face and then moving on.  You don’t have to move fast or far.  You can go just an inch.  You can mark your progress breath by breathI have breathed my way through so many people who I felt wronged by; through so many situations I couldn’t change.  Sometimes while doing this I have breathed in acceptance and breathed out love.  Sometimes I’ve breathed in gratitude and out forgiveness.  Sometimes I haven’t been able to muster anything beyond the breath itself, my mind forced blank with nothing but the desire to be free of sorrow and rage.

Self-pity is a dead-end road.  You make the choice to drive down it.  It’s up to you to decide to stay parked there or to turn around and drive out.”

When bad things happen, often the only way back to wholeness is to take it all apart.”

I’ll leave you with this:

What if I forgave myself? I thought. What if I forgave myself even though I’d done something I shouldn’t have? What if I was a liar and a cheat and there was no excuse for what I’d done other than because it was what I wanted and needed to do? What if I was sorry, but if I could go back in time I wouldn’t do anything differently than I had done? What if I’d actually wanted to fuck every one of those men? What if heroin taught me something? What if yes was the right answer instead of no? What if what made me do all those things everyone thought I shouldn’t have done was what also had got me here? What if I was never redeemed? What if I already was?
Cheryl Strayed, Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail