Sober boosts

On giving up drinking I have noticed that I have been getting these ‘sober boosts’.  Every 6-8 weeks or so I get an increase in the feeling of physical and emotional well-being from the increased length of time without a drink.  It reminded me of the development of babies and developmental leaps that they have. … Continue reading Sober boosts

One day like this …..

Growing up we didn’t ‘do’ emotions in our house so they were denied or ignored and I grew up emotionally mute.  It was when I discovered music that I found a ‘voice’ for my emotions.  If I couldn’t express them I could always find a singer, band or DJ who could.  Like many others music formed the soundtrack to my life with many nights and week-ends spent clubbing, raving and gigging and always with a drink in my hand.

Since I stopped drinking I have steered away from listening to music fearful that the old association with alcohol would be awakened and the cravings would start.  I also worried that without drink I wouldn’t be able to manage the emotions that would be triggered.  But sitting on my pink cloud I thought that maybe this would be a good time to test the waters.  So I stuck on a CD and listened to this song:

I love this band and particularly this song and have poignant memories of seeing Elbow performed this track live.  Today tears were indeed shed but confusingly they were the result of happiness and sadness.  I was bemused because how I’ve been feeling the last few days was the emotional state that I would always chase when drinking – that happy elated joyous feeling and this song captures this so well.  The sad irony of my thinking that if I drank I would feel this way when in fact I have achieved this feeling by doing the exact opposite.  If I could bottle my pink cloud feeling and put it into a song this would be it …….. Day 75.

Friday Sober Inspiration: The Four Essential Processes of Grieving

So I’ve spoken about grief and grieving before in this post and this was a great podcast about the subject too. As I’ve continued to read Pete Walker The Tao of Fully Feeling he has described his four essential processes of grieving .  So I’m going to add to my knowledge from Kubler-Ross and include … Continue reading Friday Sober Inspiration: The Four Essential Processes of Grieving